I had a different blog post half-written for today, but something happened at work that got me thinking thinking thoughts. It all started innocently enough, with the only man in my office sharing via email a somewhat humorous advertisement for the JC Penney's jewelry counter.
My boss responded, with a "funny" story about how one time her husband got her a vacuum cleaner for Christmas and a toaster for her wedding anniversary. Sometimes it's just better to get nothing at all! Now let's all lol!
Except I wasn't feeling very lol-y. One of my co-workers responded, in a self-deprecating way, that she would welcome the gift of a vacuum cleaner. I didn't respond at all. If I had, it would have been something like, "Oh, yes, that is so funny. I hate it when someone spends over $200 on something that I need and would use, thereby saving me from having to spend that money. I'm so glad my husband doesn't have a job so he can't get me something expensive like a vacuum cleaner. This commercial is so right on!"
The more I thought about it, the more lathered up I got. I'd heard this story once before from the boss. That time, it was prefaced with, "We don't buy each other gifts anymore. If we want something, we just go out and get it ourselves." Well, isn't that a nice thing to do WHEN YOU HAVE THE MONEY TO GO BUY WHATEVER YOU DAMN WELL PLEASE.
Sidebar: I'm trying very hard not to virtually burn my boss in effigy in this blog post. Let me just put it this way, have you ever read GOOP, you know Gwyneth Paltrow's lifestyle blog where she's all, "My friend Mario Batali says you should only eat mushrooms from northern Italy that have been discovered by midgets who can find them better because they're closer to the ground. At $500 per ounce, these are a bargain!" and "I think everyone should have their own personal uniform. It makes it easier to start your day when you know your style can take you from dropping the offspring of myself and singer-songwriter Chris Martin off at school to a lunch meeting with movie producer and my godfather, Steven Spielberg, at The Connaught Bar to a night out with my very good friend Vince Gill after we sing together onstage at the Country Music Awards. I put mine uniform together with the help of my good friend and fashion designer Stella McCartney." Like she hasn't even imagined that some people can't afford a Christmas get-away to Puerta Vallarta, much less being able to dine in the best restaurants once you're there? On a less ostentatious scale, that is my boss.
Sidebar #2: I also was thinking about how we are so politically correct about everything. Maybe we should all stop and think about being a little more politically correct about money. I mean, if I were to go deaf tomorrow, I hope my boss wouldn't try to share a CD of an amazing Christmas cantata. You know, this is the lady to whom I had to confess that we wouldn't be able to afford to put my husband on my health insurance plan. I didn't say, "We just like to gamble," I said, "We just can't afford it." It's not like she doesn't know. But I'm probably just being too sensitive...
Once I got over being bitter about it, I started thinking about how that commercial paints us, as wives, as husbands, as white middle-class, as Americans. It is pretty awful, if you think about it. The man thinks he can purchase something to make the woman's life easier--a flawed premise, if you ask me. The woman is so ungrateful that she throws the man in prison. Wow, how many people out there would love, love to be able to afford a fancy vacuum cleaner, or any vacuum cleaner at all, or the house to use it in?
So I'm putting my foot down. I may not be able to get this through Congress, but I can get this through to the what four? of you that read my blog regularly. Thanksgiving may very well be the best American invention ever. It deserves better than the fourth Thursday of November. It deserves better than turkey and dressing (and the good macaroni & cheese--you know who you are!). Thanksgiving should be every day. We should reflect on all the many, many, many blessings we have not just on one day, but on every day. If we can't be bothered to marvel at our own good fortune and give thanks for it, we all deserve to be in the dog house.
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Breakfast: Oatmeal and free blueberries (Thanks, Mom, for your hard work in picking and preparing those berries and for sharing them with me.) 11 cents
Snack: Granola bar (I'm very thankful to Smitten Kitchen for sharing the recipe for these granola bars with the internet.) 21 cents
Lunch: Enchilada (How blessed I am to be able to just stop by the grocery store on my way home from work to pick up what I need to make enchiladas for dinner any night I want!) 99 cents
Dinner: Massive Amounts of Junk (I may not be able to afford much, but if I feel the desire to go to the grocery store for some stress-eating foods, I am thankful that I can blast my food budget out of the water and get whatever junky stuff sounds good.) I ate some chocolate covered peanut butter sandwiches that cost about $1.40 and a hot pocket that cost $1.25 and some jalapeno popper things that were about $1.50.
Total: $5.45
And I'm thankful that I have great friends who read this blog, not because I'm the picture of virtue and perpetually upbeat, but because I'm bound to fail occasionally, get down about it, and pick myself up. We all do it. That's just what makes us interesting.
So, a day early and every day after, what are you thankful for?
I'm sorry that I wasn't there, but in my head I can hear the conversation as clear as day. I. Love. This. Blog. By the way, I'm still using my tiny dorm-sized dirt devil for a house that is now completely covered in carpet. I can only dream of a new vacum.
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