The day was going so well, right up until 10:30, the time my boss usually shows up for work.
One of the first things he did was give me a lecture about "dreaming big." Here's what happened. I told him I was nominating a project for an award. He asked if we had a chance. I said maybe we could get an honorable mention but probably not the big prize and began to describe the type of institution that usually wins. He cut me off (per usual) and told me I needed to dream bigger. At which point I punched him in the face* and pointed out that he's the one who asked about our chances and that I was--after all--doing the work of nominating. Then he asked me if we were going to apply for an award from *this* organization. He had to rifle through a stack of papers to show me which organization he was talking about because he doesn't actually know the name of it. I said that their awards don't happen until Fall, but, of course it was on my radar. Then I escaped with only one name having been dropped.**
Later this day, (yes, all of this before noon) he gave me a compli-plaint (a compliment coupled with a sneaky criticism or complaint; different than a back-handed compliment) and then he reminded me with annoying meddling why I don't tell him about the things I'm working on.
*Punching did not actually occur.
** I think my new way of marking the length of our conversations will be counting the number of names he drops.
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